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A Love Story, Part 2

This is the second part in a series about our adoption story. You can read Part One here

After God turned our hearts to Ukraine, and orphans with special needs there, we knew we had to go check it out for ourselves. I remember the first time we visited Romaniv in 2012. We saw Vladik there and our hearts were touched because we saw that he had Apert Syndrome like Jonah, the boy we had loved. I even wrote a bit about him here. Then, as you know, we ended up moving to Ukraine in November of 2013. YAY!

After our move, we began to visit Romaniv every week with MTU (Mission to Ukraine) and grew to love all the boys. The boys in the Isolation Hall were our main focus and every week our love for them deepened as we came to know them more.


We loved Vladik very much, but honestly, not any differently than any of the other boys. I guess he held a special place in our hearts because of Jonah, but we weren’t considering adoption at all. I promise! Ha! We had ended up adopting our Seth before we moved and felt that someday we would adopt again, and most likely that would be a Ukrainian adoption, but the idea was far away in the future. We did not even remotely think about adopting one of our boys. I mean, how could you pick just one, when our biggest dream is that they would all know the love of a family? Yeah, not happening.

Then came MTU summer camp. The last two summers our family has had the EXTREME pleasure of serving at camps for kids with disabilities, put on by Mission to Ukraine, one of our non-profit partners here in Zhytomyr.

They have loved our Vladik for many years. Just look at these pictures! 

  
  
MTU actually plays a giant role in every part of this adoption. We came to Zhytomyr to volunteer for MTU. We heard about the work they were doing at Romaniv and longed to be a part of it. They had been visiting the boys for several years before we came along. If it weren’t for God leading us to MTU there is no doubt in my mind- we would not know Vladik. 🙂 THANK YOU MTU!!!!

Anyway, every year Romaniv sends 6 boys to MTU’s camp, along with one of the nannies. This is outrageously amazing for our boys. They never ever leave the grounds of Romaniv. It is their entire world. But, every summer 6 boys get to escape for 8 days and truly LIVE.

They are treasured at camp. They laugh at camp. They play at camp. It’s like Disneyland on steroids for these boys. We were at camp last July waiting for the bus to arrive from Romaniv and who, to our enormous surprise, stepped off the bus? VLADIK! We had no idea any of our boys from Isolation were coming!!!! Vladik had never been to camp before! We were so happy!!!!

You guys, Vladik did so great at camp. Oh, my word. He started out the week with many institutional behaviors (screaming at the wrong time, loud noises at inappropriate times…) but after only 2 days at camp, those behaviors were gone. He was trying to sing the songs and do the motions. He was doing his best at the games. He was sitting quietly during lessons. He gained new words every day. It was so beautiful.



The most unexpected and most beautiful thing for Jed and me was how Vladik connected with our kids. Addy and Ezra had met him at Romaniv before camp, and Vladik had immediately taken a liking to Ezra. Vladik likes most people, but for some reason (God) he really latched on to Ezra during the couple of times Ez came to Romaniv. That relationship only grew at camp- and the feeling was mutual. Ez was drawn to Vladik and really began to love him.



One night toward the end of camp, I was putting the kids to bed in our room and all the lights were out. Jed was away and the kids and I were talking about our day. I asked them each what was the best moment of their day and the most difficult moment of their day. That day the camp had held the Special Olympics, so there were a lot of great moments to talk about. When it came to my turn to share Ezra piped up, “Mom, I bet I know what your hardest moment was. When the Romaniv boys were getting their medals at the Olympics I saw you crying. I bet that was hard for you.” I answered him that that moment was actually my best and most difficult moment all at once. It was the best because I saw all the joy on the boys’ faces and I was so happy to see them so happy. But it was the hardest because they were the only campers who didn’t have a mommy to walk them up to the front to get their medal. I was sad because I knew they were going home tomorrow and I knew that their home was not a good place.

All of a sudden, in the dark room I heard a weeping, almost a wailing coming from one of the beds. It was Ezra! “Ezra! What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“Mommy, why? Why do the boys have to live there? Why do they have no mommy? It’s not fair. I don’t want them to go back there! Why does Vladik have to live there? He’s my friend. How long is he gonna have to wait till his family finds him?”

 

Pretty soon all four of my kids were weeping. Their hearts were broken for the boys. In that moment they really got it. They really began to understand why we live here in Ukraine. They began to understand why we sold everything and came to love these boys. Ezra said “Mom, we can never leave Ukraine. The boys need us!”

That camp, that night, our kids fell in love with Vladik. That night my heart began to shift. I began to see Vladik in a new way. I shared the story with Jed and he cried. We could barely stand to see him get on that bus to head back to Romaniv. Something was stirring. God was up to something!!

PS: Thank you MTU for the pics of Vladik when he was little 🙂 

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A Love Story, Part 1

This is the first in a series of posts about our adoption.  It’s a miraculous story and I pray God uses it to speak to other families who are considering adoption.  So many boys and girls like our Vladik wait and wait for their lives to begin.  Every child deserves the love of a family.  Would you read with an open heart and ask God how He would have you respond? 

This is a love story.  For God so loved Vladik, that He preserved his life until the day his mommy and daddy would find him.  For God so loved our family, that He picked us up out of our lives and dropped us across the world so that we could find our baby.

One night, in August 2010, with newborn Seth, our foster baby asleep at my side, I was browsing online.  I have no idea what I was looking for, but somehow I came across the blog of a woman who had just returned from Ukraine, having adopted two little girls with Down Syndrome.  Her story caught my attention and I ended up reading her whole adoption story in one evening.  One blog led to another, which led to another, and pretty soon I found myself immersed in a world I had had no idea existed, the world of special needs adoption.  My heart was broken in two, never to be the same.


Jed and I always knew we would adopt someday.  We believed in orphan care and it was important to us.  Since before we were married we had dreamed of moving overseas to care for orphans.  That’s why I became a nurse!  While we waited for God to send us overseas we fostered medically fragile babies.  So yeah, adoption was on our radar, but not orphans with disabilities, or kids with disabilities in general.  We just hadn’t thought of it.  Well, maybe that’s not all true.  We had thought of it and then rejected it.  “Yes, we’ll adopt- but only healthy kids.  We could never raise a child that would require our hands-on care forever.”  We fostered babies with special needs, but that wasn’t permanent.

Jed with baby Seth, during our fostering days 🙂

A while later I came upon Julia’s blog.  Julia was advocating and still does advocate, for orphans with disabilities.  Fun Fact: We have since met each other twice here in Ukraine, and Julia even got to come to Romaniv to meet our Boys!  Isn’t God fun?   Julia was advocating for a little guy in Ukraine with Apert Syndrome.  Did you know our new son Vladik has this same syndrome? Like I said, God is fun 🙂  I had never heard of that syndrome and didn’t know anything about it, but that boy struck me.  I read her post and learned that he was 4 years old and about to be transferred to a bad place- an institution.  He needed to be adopted quickly.  I’m telling you what, I fell for that baby hard.  Jed came home one night to a red-faced, sobbing wife and was a little confused.  Ha!  I started rambling to him about Ukraine and orphans with disabilities and mental institutions and teenagers in cribs and “aging out” and he stood there shocked.  I told him “We have to DO SOMETHING.  We can’t just sit by and let this happen.  We have to do something!!!”  He was a little shell-shocked but agreed to pray about it and see if God laid it on his heart as well.  What a guy.  🙂

In the meantime “Jonah”, the little Apert guy was constantly on my mind.  His face was in my dreams.  I would weep over him and all the little ones in cribs as I did the dishes. My heart ached and the ache wouldn’t stop.  The Holy Spirit was at work.  God was working in Jed’s heart too, and soon we were both praying about how to respond to Jonah, specifically.  We prayed for many months.  We sought counsel from our parents and our pastor.  We prayed some more.  Then in early 2011, after much prayer, many miracles, and confirmations (SO MANY), it became abundantly clear that God was asking us to move forward to adopt Jonah.

The first photo we saw of Jonah

We were so excited!!!  This sweet one who had captured our hearts would be our son!  Gone were the worries about raising a child who would need our care forever.  We could have cared less.  All of our old worries and hesitations seemed so selfish.  In the light of what these babies suffer without a mommy and daddy to fight for them, in the light of what Jesus did for us…how could I be worried about losing our “empty nester” years???  Our child needed us.

So, we sent in the initial commitment paperwork and money to say to the adoption world “You don’t need to advocate for this one anymore, we’re coming for him!”  In Ukraine, there is no referral given to adoptive families before they travel.  You can pursue the adoption of a certain child, but until you actually get to Kyiv and request their file there is no guarantee that you will actually get that child.  Another family could go there first and adopt them, not knowing your intentions.  You could get there and that child may not even be adoptable.  There are many unknowns.  We were aware of that, but when we got the email a few weeks after we had sent in our initial paperwork, letting us know that another American family who was already in Ukraine was adding our boy to their adoption, we were utterly devastated.

Shocked.  Heartbroken.  Confused.  Happy for our Jonah, that he could have a mommy and daddy so soon, but heartsick that they were not us.

We had loved Jonah from afar for many months and now we would never even get to meet him.  God had spoken so clearly.  We had researched the heck out of Apert Syndrome and felt so well-equipped.  Miracles paved the way for us to begin the adoption process.  God, what was that all about?  What were you doing?  Why?

Then God spoke again.  Jed was out mowing the lawn, praying, asking God what He was up to and he felt God speak to Him so clearly,

“Jed, I am so much more interested in the process than in the end result.  You have one end result in mind, but I’m taking you on a journey.  I needed you to love Jonah like a father.  I needed you to love him with abandon.  I needed you to have that father’s heart for Jonah because I need you to love lots of little boys and girls like Jonah.”

And so it happened that a little boy with Apert Syndrome caught our hearts and led us to Ukraine.  A little boy with Apert Syndrome broke our hearts for Ukrainian orphans.  He helped us to fall in love with children with disabilities- so in love that we would give up everything and cross the world to touch them and smile at them and hold them in our arms.  God used Jonah to start us on the best journey of our lives- the journey to our Boys and our own little treasure, our Vladik.

To be continued 🙂

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Introducing…

  
Vladislav Christopher Johnson- orphan no more! 

Today, in a courtroom in Romaniv, Ukraine, Vladik was legally declared to be our son. We are officially a family of seven! 

Ours was the first international adoption in the town of Romaniv and we are praying it helps to pave the way for many more to come after us. The court went well and although it was a long, serious affair, there was nothing scary or tense about it. All the parties represented agreed that our family adopting Vladik was in his best interest. The representative from the orphanage said “You can see they love him like parents.  It’s almost like he’s already a part of their family!” 

Ain’t that the truth. 

Remember when I wrote this post about Vladik being found by a super lucky family? So yeah, the secret’s out: we are that most lucky family. It was KILLING us to keep the secret for all those months. Whew! I’m so glad we can now share our joy with the world. 

The story of how we came to adopt Vladik is wonderful and beautiful, and tomorrow I’ll begin to share it all with you.

Now we have a 10-day wait (Ukrainian law), and then we will be able to take Vladik out of the orphanage FOREVER. 

The first of our Boys, redeemed. 

Once he was abandoned, but today he is a beloved son, brother, grandson, nephew, and cousin.

Our hearts are full and we pray many families will come after us. Our Boys are absolutely treasures. How blessed are we that God gave one of those precious treasures to us for our very own?? We are the luckiest. 

Praise God. He sets the lonely in families!!!! 

  

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The Skinny

I’m here!  I’m here!  Oh.My.Gooooooodness.  It’s been such a long time.

I had this whole introspective, from-the-gut-post in the works, but, while trying to finish it up I realized I just don’t have the energy for that right now.  So, you get a not-from-the-gut informative post instead.  🙂

There are a whole lot of emotions goin’ on around here, that’s for sure.  We are gearing up for our first visit back to the States, as a family.  We leave on Tuesday.  WHAT????  Pure craziness I tell ya.  Our life is never boring.  All my introspective writing was on our feelings about leaving our Boys and it was UGLY. The thought of being so far away from our Boys for several months brings on an instantaneous sob-fest, so I’d rather not delve too deep into that topic.  Let’s just say that we don’t want to leave them, but we are excited to be with family and friends.  It’s confusing, and not black and white.  So, there.

  

Here’s the skinny on what is happening in our life.  Deep breath, here goes:

ADOPTION.  We are in the home stretch of the adoption process!  In fact, we were supposed to have court today, but it was rescheduled for August 31st.  There were no jurors available today and yeah, it’s frustrating, I cried a lot, but we know that God’s timing is perfect.  After court on August 31st, there will be a 10-day mandatory waiting period and then we will get to take our boy out of Romaniv forever!!!!  I can’t wait to introduce him to you!

TRAVEL TO THE US.  We had already planned, before our move to Ukraine that we would head to the US as a family for our first visit in August 2015.  Many, many months ago my parents planned that when we arrived, in August 2015, they would take all of their kids and grandkids to Disneyland.  Well, the time is upon us!  Woohoo!  The timing is a little stinky, with our adoption court rescheduling, but oh well.  We are just thanking God for this last big hurrah before we have another son and our lives change forever.   Don’t people call that like a “babymoon” or something crazy like that?  Let’s call Disneyland our “babymoon”, never mind that our baby is 15 years old.  Hehe.  (details, details)

So our family will leave Ukraine on Tuesday and fly straight to California.  We will have a few days to catch our breath before my family joins us for Disney.  Jed will leave Disney early (on the 20th) to fly back to Ukraine.  He was supposed to be picking up our son at that point, but then court was rescheduled, and yada yada yada.  We couldn’t change his ticket.  Whatevs.  The kids and I will head to Oregon after Disneyland and start to get settled a bit, get ready for school to start.  I will fly back to Ukraine for court on the 29th.  I’ll leave the kids with family and friends in Oregon.

After court, I will come back to Oregon and Jed will stay in Ukraine to finish up all the documents for our new son.  Then he and our newest Johnson will fly and meet us in Oregon.  Together at last!!!

  
 

HOUSING.  We decided right after we got home from camp that it would be best to move out of the house we rent in Ukraine and put our stuff in storage.  We really can’t afford to pay for a house that’s not being used here, and a house that we’ll be using in Oregon.  So, we’ve been busy packing up and moving out.  FUN.

While in Oregon we will be renting a house from some crazy-generous friends who are giving us a screaming deal.  Praise God!!!  Friends and family are letting us borrow stuff to set up a temporary Oregon home.  🙂  Thanks!   We don’t know where we’ll live when we come back from America, but we’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.    I can’t think about it now or my head will explode.

SCHOOL.  Our kids (minus the new arrival) will be attending school in Oregon!  This will be a first for them.  Addy and Ez have been to school in Ukraine, but we homeschooled in the US before, so this will be a new adventure for us.  We know our new son will need a TON of medical care and there is just no way I can meet his needs and homeschool 4 kids, so this feels like the most peaceful decision.  I’m a little nervous about it though!  Eeeek!

TIMING.  We aren’t exactly sure how long we will be in the US.  The working plan is that Jed will stay for about 2 months, and then return to Ukraine.  There is a TON of work that needs to be done here (always) and he just can’t be gone for a long time.  The kids and I will stay behind in Oregon until our new son gets the medical care that he urgently needs.  We don’t know how long that will take.  We anticipate more than one major surgery with specialist surgeons.  Things like that just don’t happen fast.  I’m prepping myself to be gone from Ukraine for at least 6 months.  I can’t think about it too much though or I turn into a basket case.  Oh, my friends at Romaniv!  But, our top priority is getting our new son healthy, so we will do what it takes to make that happen.  🙂

  
 

WIDE AWAKE.  Are you signed up for our newsletters?  If you aren’t, you should. You can do it here.  I’ll confess that we have not been stellar about sending them out super regularly this year.  But it’s in our hearts to do better with that.  Anywayssss in our last newsletter we talked about Wide Awake’s partnership with a local church here in Zhytomyr.  Christian Youth Church is the church our family attends here in Z-town and we love our friends there.  The vast majority of Wide Awake’s volunteers are from Youth Church, and they are our fam here in Ukraine.

Wide Awake gave a grant to Youth Church to be used to carry on the work with our Boys while we are in the US.  The grant pays for the work of volunteer recruitment and management and will pay for the drivers and gas to get the teams to Romaniv while we are away.  Vika, our friend and volunteer, is in charge of the Romaniv work for Youth Church and she has already done an amazing job of growing the work while we were away at camp.  She has recruited many new volunteers and we have now added a Saturday team!  So now the boys get teams coming AT LEAST three days a week, and many weeks they get even more visits than that.  Praise God for Youth Church and their love for the Boys!  We are leaving the work in good hands and we know that our teams will continue to be faithful, even though we will be so far away.  What a huge relief!

That’s the skinny!  It’s a lot.  I know.  If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask.  Thanks for coming along on this wild ride.  We could never do it alone.  🙂

  

  

 

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The Crazy Awesomeness that is our Summer Plans

Summer is in full swing around here and it kind of feels like we’re on a roller coaster at this point.  We know we’re safe, we’re all buckled in, but it’s moving a little too fast for comfort and we kinda want it to slow down, but it’s also really good and all the spins are kind of fun, we we don’t want it to stop.

There’s a lot going on and there’s about to be a lot MORE going on, so I better fill you in while I have the chance.  HOLYMOLY.

We have a volunteer arriving on Sunday and she’ll be here for 3 weeks!  Sara is a massage therapist and works at a community for adults with special needs in Arizona.  She will be helping us implement massage at Romaniv and will be doing some teaching for the nurse there.  We are excited to have her along on this crazy journey.  I’m super interested to see how the boys do with massage!  I’m anticipating a strong learning curve…hehe  THISCOULDGETINTERESTING.

On July 7th we’ll head to Mission to Ukraine’s yearly summer camp for kids with disabilities.  There will be two camps and we will volunteer at both of them. Camp was the highlight of our family’s year last year, so we are very excited to do it again.  Woot!  We’ll basically be there for the month of July.  MTU camp is like my heaven.  ILOVEITSOMUCH.

On July 13th we’ll take a little leave from camp because we have our appointment in Kyiv to request our referral and officially begin the adoption process here in country!!!  Yes!!!  Our adoption dossier was accepted and we are ultra, mega, outrageously excited to get this show on the road.  If all goes well we should have our son out of the orphanage and in our arms by the end of August!  CAN’TCOMESOONENOUGH.

 After the adoption is complete we will all head to the US for our first visit as a family since our move here in 2013.  Our new son will need to go to the US in order to become a citizen, and he also needs quite a bit of medical care, so off we go!  Actually, before we ever moved to Ukraine we had decided that August 2015 would be the time for all of us to come back to the US to visit family, friends, and supporters.  We just had no idea we’d also be bringing back another child!  BIGGESTSURPRISEEVAHHHHH.

The plan right now is that Jed will be in the US for about 2 months and then he’ll return to Ukraine to get back to work. The kids and I will plan to stay in the US until we get our new son’s most urgent medical needs met.  Then we’ll join Jed back in Ukraine. We’re thinking maybe the kids and I will be in the States till after Christmas?  I’m just not sure.  We’re open and we don’t want to rush things.  But in a way it will probably feel like our lives are on pause.  I’m not sure how we’ll navigate that well.  I guess one day at a time.  I get overwhelmed if I think about it too much, so I won’t.  At least not right now.  🙂 PROCRASTINATIONISMYSPIRITUALGIFT.


So, that’s where things stand right now.  A lot goin on, and lot yet to come.  We are doing well, just maybe a bit overwhelmed at the moment.  We have so many ideas, so many plans for the Boys, for the work here.  It’s hard to imagine leaving it all and going so far away.  Wide Awake is granting our local church here in Zhytomyr with funds to be able to coordinate and continue the work at Romaniv while we are gone, so that is really reassuring.  We won’t be leaving the boys without love and care.  Our volunteers will continue to faithfully go and love the boys.  It will just be hard for us to be away. Yet it will be wonderful to be with family and friends in America.  Yet we will also be adjusting to a new son and helping him learn how to be part of a family.  Yet we will not be bringing him home to the house and community where we actually live…at least not right away.

Lots of thoughts, lots of emotions, lots of awesomeness happening, lots of everything.  I’ll do my best to keep you posted along the way.  Thank you all for being such a dear part of this journey.  Thank you for your prayer, your encouragement, your friendship, your financial support.  We have felt so much love and support along every step of this journey.  Praise God we don’t have to walk this path alone!  You are a blessing to us.   WELOVEYOULOTSANDLOTS.

Pics: Hava in Kyiv with her perty new headband, our beautiful Addy and Hava in Kyiv, St. Andrews Church in Kyiv, our kids with a famous statue outside the adoptions office in Kyiv, St. Michaels Church in Kyiv (my fave), Seth is taller than Hava (and 17 months younger!), my everyday morning view, our garden when it was beautiful, our garden infested with bugs (grrrr…ain’t nobody got time for that!), Seth posing with his new bike, my kids being “special”, our neighborhood!

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Ask, and Keep on Asking

We have been so privileged and honored to have an amazing medical team here from Germany the past couple of weeks.  I tear up every time I think of them.  They are with our Boys right now and I feel so incredibly humbled that they would take time off work and spend their own money to serve our boys with their whole selves.

Having them here beside us, fighting for our Boys right along with us, has been absolutely humbling and awe-inspiring.  I am changed because of it. You see, I know, and Jed knows that our Boys have tremendous value.  No one needs to prove that to us.  They are our dear friends.  Jed and I were talking about it the other night,  and I can honestly say that we have to come to the point where we love them as much as we love our own four children here at home.  I’m a mother of 90.  🙂  We would go to the ends of the earth for our Addy, Ezra, Havalah, and Seth.  And so we would for our 86 other children that languish in isolation, hidden, thrown away by society.

Having the German team here has made my mama heart swell.  Watching their tenderness with our babies, their tenacity in not settling for second best, and the way they have risen up and made this fight for dignity their own, well, it has shown me even more how valuable our boys are.  You see, during the past months as we were planning this trip for the German team we were a bit nervous (mostly I was…haha).  I kept wondering if the team members would think this cause was of value.  I wondered if they would really be able to help and if they would feel that coming to our Boys was a good use of their time.  In that worrying, I was devaluing our friends.  I was assuming that no one would love them like we do, that no foreigners with prestigious medical degrees and full patient loads at home would want to “feet on the ground” fight for them.  What was I thinking?????  The team immediately valued our Boys and have fought tooth and nail for them over the past couple of weeks. The team members have grown to love the boys immensely, and through their love I have been inspired to press on even further for our boys.

They deserve it.

We are their voices.  If we stay silent about their potential, their need, and their reality, then who will speak for them? So, I will ask and keep on asking.

Do you have room for one of our loves at your table? 

They have no future here.  We are fighting to give them one, but still, no future we can provide could adequately replace a family.

Yes, they are broken.  Yes, they have been traumatized.  Yes, they have medical needs.  Yes, they will require hard work and endless hours of sacrifice on the part of the adoptive family.  Yes, adoption is expensive- in every way.  Yes, they have experienced things no human being should ever have to experience and yes, they are scarred from those experiences.

BUT

Did you know that they are absolutely beautiful?  Did you know that Ben smiled for the first time in his life last week?  Did you know it was a moment of rejoicing and the whole room exploded with cheers?  Did you know Isaiah’s face lights up when a familiar voice calls his name? He’s really ticklish too 🙂 Did you know Micah has an amazing personality??  He has us all in stitches so much of the time.  Did you know Stephan laughs a deep-down belly laugh when you spin him around and around?  In those moments he is so handsome.  Did you know that Alex loves Jed?  Did you know he is so helpful and his face absolutely beams when he knows he has been a good helper?  Did you know Jonathan might just have the most beautiful smile in the whole institution?  He comes running over when he sees us and his smile melts my heart every time.  Did you know Aaron sat calmly on my lap the other day and took my arm to wrap it around himself?  Did you know he is happiest outside and loves the feel of the sun on his face?

These are our babies.  We went to the end of the world for them and we’ll keep right on going.  This week is the third week in a row that our team has been at the institution every single day.  Great gains have been made, yet with more time spent,  more ugliness has been exposed.  These boys are not just a sad or romantic idea.  They are precious creations of God and they should not have to live the way they live.  It is injustice heaped upon injustice.

Their very lives are being stolen from them, but we are not helpless to change that!  There are seven who are adoptable, who have a chance at a different life and we will not stop fighting until that chance is realized.

If you know you can not adopt, would you pray?  Would you donate to their adoption funds and help ease the financial burden for the families who step up for them?  Would you share their faces with all of your friends and family?  Would you be a voice for them?

But maybe you could adopt?  Why not you?  If you have never considered it would you please consider it now?  Our two littles, Ben and Isaiah, are truly living on borrowed time.  They simply can not wait forever.  Our Alex and Micah must have committed adoptive families by the end of this year or they will lose their chance forever.

I’m just gonna ask and keep on asking.  They’re our babies and we will not stop fighting for them. It’s my mama duty.

*Click on the names to donate to their adoption grant fund. 

*To find out more information about the Ukrainian adoption process please contact the awesome team at Hand of Help in Adoption.

*Please feel free to contact me for more information about the individual boys.  I would be happy to answer your questions!

IMG_2184Ben

IMG_2183Isaiah

IMG_2193Micah

IMG_2157Alex

IMG_1052Stephan

IMG_2163Jonathan

IMG_2192Aaron

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Revisiting Yes.

A couple weeks ago at church a young guy came up to me that I’d never met before.  He spoke some English and wanted to try out his skills, so we chatted for a bit.  He said “I heard you guys work at the orphanage for sick children and now you will take one of them home to be your son!”  I said yes, he was correct that we are in the process of adopting one of our Boys and then proceeded to proudly show him lots and lots of pictures of our special boy on my phone.  As soon as he saw the pictures his face fell.  He was obviously a little shocked, and obviously a little confused at my proud exclamation of how sweet and cute and special our boy is.

Then he asked the question that I’m sure many have wanted to ask, but so far no one else has been brave enough to utter:

“Why?  Why would you do this?  I don’t understand.  Why?????”

I paused for a second, happy that he had the guts to say what was really on his mind, because it was definitely written all over his face. 😉  I answered with the simple truth:

“Because we love him, God asked us to, and we said yes!”

It’s a simple truth, but there is a lot more behind it, a lot more led up to it, and there is a lot more weight that goes along with it.

This adoption yes was not a simple yes.  Much prayer, many tears, many conversations and sleepless nights led to this yes. In fact, many years of “yeses” led to this yes.

I remember in 2010 when our Ukraine story first began.  We knew that God was asking us to say yes to adopting a little boy from Ukraine with multiple special needs.  Oh boy, that was a hard yes to come to.  There was nothing simple about that.  We had always been open to adoption.  We were fostering our Seth at that time and were really hoping we would be able to adopt him.  Adoption and orphan care was important to us!  But I always said I could never adopt a child with a disability.  No way!!!   Willingly take on a child that would remain a child for life?  Knowingly adopt a child that would never live alone and would need my care for all their life?  Give up the dream of retiring someday with Jed and traveling the world together (child-free!)?  Heck no!  Are you crazy????  Who would do that??????  That would be so hard!  I guess some people are meant for that life, but not us.

Oh how the times have changed…hehe

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I remember back in those days, praying about that certain boy who needed a family.  I couldn’t get his face out of my mind. I  couldn’t forget him, even if I wanted to.  I began to rethink my reasons for saying no to him.  The more I examined my line of reasoning the more my argument sounded rather lame.  All my reasons for saying no were because I wasn’t willing to lay down my life and my comfort.  I really, reeeeeeeally like to be comfy.  Oh I love comfy clothes, comfy socks, comfy shoes (no heels here!), comfy hoodies, comfort foods, comfy chairs, a comfortable salary, a comfy house, friends I can be super comfy with.  And most of all I love a comfy future.  I like to know what’s coming and I like to like what I know is coming.  I don’t like things that make me uncomfortable- like exercise, hard manual labor, and things that are out of my control.

Misha H.

Saying yes to adopting a child with severe disabilities is the exact opposite of comfy.  It’s inviting stress and pain and hard work and expenses and a lot of “out of control” moments into my life.

BUT,

God doesn’t call us to lives of comfort.  He doesn’t call us to lives of free and easy living where happiness and security are the ultimate goal.  He says to us “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and loses his own soul? Or what will a man give in exchange for his soul?” (Matt. 16:24-26)

Friends, living a “chasing-comfort” life is no life at all.  Jesus says that the only way we can save our own lives is to give them up for Him. That’s not a call to comfort- it’s a call to sacrifice.  There’s just no way to put it lightly.  Once I considered what Jesus was willing to do for me, how could I say no to a little one so in need, in order to tend to my own comfort?  Ick.

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That original adoption didn’t work out, but you probably know that that is what God used to turn our hearts to Ukraine.  And here we are now, saying yes to our special boy.

Please hear me.  I am soooooo not talking down to you right now.  I am not the pro at sacrificing my comfort- just ask my husband and kids.  I fail at it all the time.  I’m still learning and I thank God for his patience with me.

The thing is, now I see what I almost turned down in favor of my comfort.  I see it in the form of our most precious boys at Romaniv.  I see it in my Dima as he sits on a plywood bed, foot tied to the slats to keep him from falling off.  I see it in my Misha when he cries, so unaccustomed to human touch that a hand on his shoulder is too much to bear.  I see it in my other Misha who has lived at Romaniv since 1987 in one single hallway, his world shrunk by injustice.  I look into the faces of my precious boys who I love like my own children and I mourn how their lives have been stolen from them for the sake of others’ comfort.  I know these boys.  Over and over again I wish I could sit down with you and just tell you all about each of them. They are AMAZING.

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Misha T. (2)

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How could we say no to them in favor of ourselves?  The world has said no to them over and over and over to the point where almost no one even knows of their existence.  It’s just not right.

I usually prefer to keep this blog upbeat, but today I’m calling you out.  I’m asking you to set your comfort aside for the sake of the yes.  This life is not all that there is.

There are boys who sit on wooden slats and never feel the grass on their feet or the sun on their face. Their lives are void of all comfort.  

There are people being sold into slavery for the pleasure of others. No comfort to be had there.

There are children sleeping on county office floors because there is no foster family to take them in.  No mommy and daddy to comfort them when they cry.

What will you do with your yes?  Will you pick up your cross?  Will you sacrifice your life for the One who gave His whole life for you?  Will you see past your comfort and your 401k dreams and your comfy couch and rise up?  We can do something about these injustices!  We must do something.  

Vladik W.

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Your yes means something.  It may mean everything to the someone who needs it, the someone sitting on a plywood bed.

The friend from church, the one who asked us why we would do this crazy adoption thing?  He said yes and visited our boys with us the next week.  As we were riding home in the car he said: “I spent the morning with the boy you are adopting.  Now I see!  I see why you would love him.  He is great!  He is so smart!  He is just…..great!!”

There is so much joy in the yes.  What will you do with yours?

*Several of our boys need adoptive families who will say yes to them.  Would you pray about that yes?  You can read more about those boys here and here.

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Guest Post: For Sweet Isaiah

*I am so excited to share a guest post from Natalie Maxwell, fellow adoptive mama!  Natalie and her husband, Ryan adopted their son, Ivan from Ukraine in 2013, and are returning soon for two more loves with special needs.  You can follow their story here.  Thank you Natalie!!*

It has only been two days since I first laid my eyes on his breathtaking face.

So full of joy…

So tender…

So unforgettable…

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Isaiah

Since that day, when I close my eyes I see his smile.

Two days ago I stumbled on Kim’s blog and was completely captured by the little boy they call Isaiah.  I told Kim that he reminds me so much of our eldest son and that’s when she asked me if I would write a guest post to advocate for him.  I said OF COURSE, and ever since I have been thinking about what I could possibly say to help this little boy’s mama find him.

So this post is to you, Isaiah’s future mama (or daddy).  I pray God uses my words to rock your world and etch this precious little boy’s face directly onto your heart.

I know how it feels to be going about your normal life when one day you stumble onto a picture that changes everything.

I know how your heart feels like it’s being pulled apart right now.

I know you probably have a million and one reasons why you could never adopt this little boy.

You may be thinking…

He’s too old… his needs are too severe…I don’t know anything about cerebral palsy…how would he fit into our family?…we don’t even have the money for an adoption.

Every child is so different, but would it help if you could take a little peak into someone else’s story, someone who once asked all of those same questions?

My husband Ryan and I had only been married for two years when I stumbled onto Ivan’s picture late one night. I could of easily hardened my heart to the constant churning or chose to drown out the Lord’s tender voice with the noise of my already busy life, but there was something in that little boy’s eyes that changed me. God began speaking to both my husband and me and made it very clear that we were supposed to fight for this little boy we had never met, who lived across the ocean.

Ivan was born in a small village in Western Ukraine. He was born premature, was diagnosed with cerebral palsy, and was abandoned soon after birth. He spent the first year of his life alone in a hospital, partly because he had bronchitis and other respiratory issues, and partly because no one knew what to do with him. After turning 1, he was brought to a baby house (an orphanage for younger children) where he spent the next 4 years of his life lying in a crib.

When we found his picture Ivan was 5 years old and in danger of being transferred to an adult mental institution, like where Isaiah lives now. We had learned of the horrid conditions of these places and knew that this tender little boy would not live long in such a place, so we began our adoption journey right away. We knew that the only way we would be able to raise the money or even be approved to adopt him would be if God made a miraculous way for us… and He DID.

Shortly after we committed to adopting Ivan he was moved from the baby house, but by some miracle, he was not transferred to an institution, but instead to an orphanage/preschool. At this place, Ivan was shown love for the first time. The care was still far from ideal, but it was during this time that he began to speak for the first time and use his hands and arms.

After meeting him it was clear that God had been preparing this precious little boy for our love.

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The day we met

Ivan has now been in our family for a year and a half and we can’t imagine life without him. From the first time I saw Ivan’s picture I just knew in my heart that he had the most tender, sweet personality, and that couldn’t have been more true. Kim told me that “Isaiah is always happy, and considering his circumstances, he really has nothing to be happy about.” That was our Ivan… a truly joyful soul hidden within the dark walls of abandonment and neglect.

That is why I’m writing to you, begging you to silence all the opposing voices and listen to the One voice that matters.

Will adopting Isaiah change your life forever?

Yes.

Will loving him through the healing of his past trauma completely break you at times?

Yes.

Will adding him to your family challenge you and your family members in almost every way imaginable?

Yes.

Will it be the hardest thing you’ve ever experienced?

Likely!

But will his smile light up your life in a way you never dreamed possible?

Yes, absolutely yes! Every. Day. YES.

Will he be worth all of the hardships and struggles he will bring?

Yes. With tears streaming down my face… YES!!

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After 10 months home

I can tell you, sweet friend, that the journey will be longer than you can imagine, and at times you may question God’s judgment in choosing you to be this precious child’s mother, but even at the end of the hardest days, you will be able to look into his eyes and know that he is safe, he is alive, and he is adored. Yes, by you, but a million times more so by His Heavenly Father and that truth will bring you to your knees in worship.

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So please, after reading this blog, if your heart is stirring, PRAY. Pray that God would give you the courage to say yes. And if you’re not Isaiah’s future mama and you’re reading this, PLEASE SHARE and tell all your friends to SHARE.

Ryan and I think often about the likelihood that our Ivan would not be alive today if we had not adopted him. The only way he would have survived life in an adult mental institution would have been if someone like Kim and Jed were there to help care for him. Kim and Jed can only do so much though, I believe they would be the first to tell you that Isaiah desperately needs a FAMILY.

Will you join me in fighting for this joyful soul?

Irakli

Sweet Isaiah

*We have many videos and pictures of Isaiah.  If you have questions about him please feel free to email me at kjohnson@wideawakeinternational.org  If you have questions about the adoption process please contact the Hand of Help in Adoption team at: inquiries@handofhelpinadoption.org.

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BIG, FAT ANNOUNCEMENT!

The secret is out!

The Johnson family is expecting!

We are so happy to share the wonderful news that we are pursuing the adoption of one of our Boys!  This is something that God has had in the works for about 5 years, unbeknownst to us.  We’ve been working fast and furiously since January, and if all goes well we should have a new son this summer!

Due to the nature of adoptions in this country, and because of our unique living situation and relationship with the insitution, we can’t announce publicly who we are adopting until the judge makes it final.  What a glorious day that will be!

Right now we have compiled our dossier and it is here in country being translated.  All we are waiting on is USCIS (US immigration) approval and then our dossier can be submitted to the adoption authorities here, and we pray pray pray they will accept it!

Everything about this situation is unique, so we just aren’t sure what will happen.  All we know is that God said to step forward, so that’s what we are doing, and it is our joy.  (Not to say there haven’t been a few sleepless nights during this process!)

Hands of Hope, our friends, and wonderful partners of Wide Awake, have supported our Boys for many, many years.  They were loving our boys before we even knew they existed!  They have been such a support to us during this process, and now they have gifted us with a $4,000 MATCHING GRANT to help with adoption costs!  We are so thankful!!!  YAY YAY YAY!!!

Adoption is super stinkin’ expensive and so many people already support our Boys so faithfully, so it felt a little strange for us to ask for help with adoption costs.  Then Hands of Hope came along and offered this help.  Wow.  God is so amazing.

Would you like to help us get one of our Boys home?  You would?????  Fantastic!  Here’s how:

An adoption fund/account has been set up for us by Hands of Hope, through Lifesong for Orphans. If enough people give donations to total $4,000, then Hands of Hope will donate another $4,000 for a grand total of $8,000!!!!!
*donations are tax-deductible and 100% of all donations go toward this adoption*

MAIL CHECKS TO
Lifesong for Orphans
PO Box 40
Gridley, IL 61744 

You MUST must note our Family name and account number in the memo so the money gets put in our fund. (Johnson/#5279)

ONLINE
Go to www.lifesongfororphans.org/give/donate , scroll down and select “Give to an adoptive family”. Fill out the form, including our name and account number (Johnson/#5279).

Thank you dear friends and family for loving us, for loving our Boys, and for your support in this YES.  We absolutely can not wait to see what love can do.  We absolutely can’t wait to see how God will use this rescue mission to speak to the hearts of directors and nannies and Ukrainian people.  He is writing a beautiful love story, and we are humbled to our knees to be a part of it.  🙂

 

PS:  Just an FYI, no Wide Awake funds have been used, or will be used to fund this adoption.  We felt like we needed to make sure you all know that.  If you have questions about the financial part of this at all, don’t hesitate to ask! 

 

PPS: Did you know you can sponsor our Boys through Hands of Hope?????  Oh yes, you can!  I’m working on a big fat post about that.  Look here for a sneak peek.

 

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A Week in Photos: April 9th + Randomness

Hi Friends!

I hope this finds you well, with a smile on your face and a spring in your step.  🙂  Things are chugging right along around here.  We’ve had a great week so far.  Lots of normalness, lots of laughs, a few tears, and plenty of coffee to fuel it all.

Last week we celebrated Seth’s Adoption Day!  The actual day was while I was in America, so we held off on the festivities till we could all be together.  Every year we take a day to celebrate that God brought Seth in to our family.  He’s only 4, so in the past we have done it more for our other kids, so that they would see the value in adoption and understand how special it is.  This was the first year Seth cared about it.  He still doesn’t fully understand what it means, but we often tell him the story of how he came to be our son, so it’s just a matter of time before he “gets it”.  All he gets right now is that it’s a special day just for him.  He chose to go out to pizza and bowling, so we did!

Oh how I love our boy.  Sometimes I can’t believe he didn’t grow inside my belly.  Just like our bio kids, I feel like Seth is an extension of me, like a piece of my heart is walking around outside my body.  I love my baby.  🙂

  

Funny Story:

Have you ever heard of “No-Poo”?  Despite it’s name, it has nothing to do with toilets.  “No-Poo” is a method of hair cleansing without shampoo- get it, no “poo”?  Shampoo strips the scalp of much of it’s natural oils that are so good for your hair.  When you strip your scalp of it’s oils, then it thinks it needs to produce more oil, then you strip them all again, then your body makes more, and on and on.  Anyway, I have been a no-pooer for a couple of years now and it’s the best ever.  I use baking soda to wash my hair, and apple cider vinegar to condition it about once a week.  It works well for me, but sometimes I feel like the soda is a bit harsh on my scalp.  In fact, hardcore no-pooers will never recommend baking soda.  But honey and aloe and all those expensive treatments aren’t realistic for me.  Baking soda is cheap and accessible, so there. I read somewhere that washing your hair with egg yolk once a month is a good way to give your scalp a little break.  So, being the weirdo/fierceless warrior/hippy that I am, I decided to give it a whirl!  Why not?

I read in the instructions that you need to make sure to only use the yolk and not the white, and to make sure the  water isn’t too hot.  Wellllllll….yeah.  I separated the egg well, or so I thought.  The water wasn’t tooooooo hot, or so I thought.  I got out of the shower and yeah, scrambled egg head.  There’s nothing more romantic than a husband who will patiently pick cooked egg out of your hair.  I’ve got a winner, folks! Now if the Denny’s jokes would just stop.  “Oh sweetie, you smell so good, now I just need a side of bacon!”  Ha.Ha. Shut up.  😉

I may smell like a diner, but my hair is soft and shiny, so I wouldn’t call it a complete failure…not completely.

We are so thankful for new volunteers! Praise God!

 

Sweet Aaron needs a mama. Do you know her?

Sweet Ben also needs a mommy and daddy. He is not thriving. Please share our boy!

Stephen is waiting for a family too. Oh my sweet boy. He loves to run and spin. Treasure.

Addy is such a great helper at Romaniv. The boys love her! The feeling is mutual.

Hava took this last picture.  I just like it.  I love cuddling in with my kiddos and reading a good book.  I’m not a “playing” mom.  I don’t like to play toys with my kids.  I’ll play Just Dance on the Wii, or jump on a trampoline, or bake cookies with you,  but please, for the love, don’t ask me to play Barbies.  I just.can’t.do.it.  What I love most, is reading to my kids.  Find us a good read-aloud and it’s all over.  I hope they will treasure the memories of us all cuddled up reading a good book.  I know I will.  🙂  (I hope they won’t mind the mild scent of brunch)

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